'Sorry it’s not a turkey sandwich, Kate': Coworker criticizes the home-cooked Thai food that her colleague shares with the office, then she gets singled out with a personalized dish of unseasoned veggies and ranch

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  • "AITA for making my coworker a separate meal after she insulted my cooking?"

    I work in a small office where we do a potluck-style lunch once a week. I love cooking, so I usually bring something homemade. For context, I'm Thai, and a lot of what I make has strong flavors
  • think: garlic, fermented fish sauce, chili, shrimp paste, that kind of thing. Most of my coworkers love it. Kate, though, has always been... weird about it.
  • She's made little comments before, like, "Wow, that's pungent" or "Your food is so intense". Once, when I brought in som tam (green papaya salad), she wrinkled her nose and said, "Ugh, why does it smell like that?" Like, it smells like lime and chili? Sorry it's not a turkey sandwich, Kate.
  • The worst was when she asked me if I "grew up eating bugs", I kind of laughed it off because I was so caught off guard, but she kept going, talking about how she saw a documentary about Thai people eating crickets and how it must be
  • "normal" for me. I told her, as evenly as I could, that yes, some people eat insects, but it's not like I was raised munching on tarantulas for breakfast. She got all flustered and said she "didn't mean it like that".
  • Anyway, last month, I made khao soi for the potluck, a Northern Thai curry noodle soup. Everyone seemed to love it, except Kate, who took one bite, made a face, and said, "Oh, this is... strong".
  • Then she laughed like it was a joke, but she barely touched her bowl. Later, I overheard her telling someone it was "too much spice and too many smells at once". So a few weeks later, when it was
  • my turn to cook again, I made my usual dish plus a plain grilled chicken breast with some steamed veggies and a little cup of ranch dressing. No seasoning, no "strong smells", etc. I left a note: "For Kate, since I know she prefers something simple!"
  • She was ped. Said I was "singling her out" and making her look bad. I told her I was just trying to be accommodating, the way she seemed to want. Some coworkers thought it was hilarious, others said I was being passive-aggressive. Honestly, maybe I was. AITA?
  • KelsarLabs Honestly? I'd stop making anything and when people ask just say, I got tired of the ride comments about my food. The blowback to her will be immediate.
  • helen_bug_lady. I would have given her a pb&j sandwich. And said, "I know you don't like anything ethnic." And when she said she felt singled out, "well yes, no one else makes comments - only you."
  • No-Shock-2055. HA! Kate s ks. I'd say NTA. If someone is going to keep insulting your food then you don't need to keep preparing it for them. Kate wanted to be an a hle and got served. I'm 100% here for it. Good for you!
  • Tipsy-boo NTA kate knows she doesn't like food with a Thai base- she only eats it so she can be ride to you. Although more kudos if you'd given her a bowl of bugs formed into a chicken fillet.
  • Frankenst Were you being passive agressive? Yes. Was it justified? Lol yes. NTA. If Kate has any problems with your cooking, she should've had a conversation with you like an adult. But no, she decided to continue making snide comments. You even went out of your way to make something that she could eat. If anything you were trying to make her feel included.
  • Pretty_Goblin11 Kate needs a reality check, I can feel the micro aggressions through the phone and I'm white. I think you handled it perfectly. NTA. Kate S ks. Edit to add: I think a happy meal should be next since she wants to be childish.
  • ShallotEvening7494 NTA and Kate's an idiot. Fresh cooked Thai food? What's NOT to love! I could just die for some tom kha soup!
  • AbsintheRedux Kate is a fool, I would be ecstatic to have legit home cooked Thai food!
  • LizzGomez Kate's been r de about your Thai cooking, snarky comments, bug jabs and all. You made her a plain meal to accommodate, she got mad. NTA, just a bit petty. Next time cook what you love, let her deal. "Bring your own if it's not your vibe" keeps it chill. You're good, her attitude's the issue
  • Selena_B305 Late publicly criticized OP's food because her food preference is on the bland side Then, when OP publicly accommodated her food taste preference. Suddenly, Kate accuses OP of singling her out. That's some Olympic level gymnastics.

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